Guess who's gonna win?

They don't know how to do it.

Having a blast with a paper bag.

This weatherman wants you to know what he's packing. And that he's kind of a douche.

Some people carry laptops in their bags, others...

"Breaking Bonaduce" star and crown jewel of The Partridge Family, Danny Bonaduce, body slammed Johnny Fairplay for good reason. He's a douche.

This commercial addresses the dilemma of feminine hygiene and the douche-tastic solutions Massengill will provide. Gotta love the 80s.

Microsoft is a pretty popular punching bag these days in i-culture. Luckily while apple fanboys make these videos, Bill can dry his tears in his sacks of money.

At first it looks like this kid is a big old douche bag, but near the end he knocks the other guy to the floor, with some major speed. Wax on, Wax off my friend.

Dear lord Michelle Marsh is running topless down the beach. If it were nearly any other woman on the planet, save Star Jones, it would be hot. But those "fun"-bags are like sacks of wet meat your step-dad is about to slug you with.

Everyone knows Rusky Slovak commie meat-heads are a waste of vodka, but these two douches sucker-punch a guy's gal. They get theirs, though!

Close a bag of chips without the clip! Amazing!

There’s nothing more enjoyable than watching a girl flash her fun bags, and by fun bags I mean boobs.

This Puerto Rican preacher thinks he's the second coming of Jesus, and his followers are paying him for it! What a douche!

Wow. K-Fed played the West Hollywood Halloween parade. What a douche.

He's got more skillz than a bag of pills! I dunno what that means!

This douche thinks he's enough of a karate expert to make videos. He can't even break boards with his face!

Every year LiquidGeneration celebrates summer by putting together a collection of beautiful, bouncing boobs. This year’s Boob Patrol features the fun bags we discovered at Lollapolooza. Till next year!

This kid's life was ruined by tea bagging. Don't worry kid, a nation mourns with you.

Get ready ladies, you're about to see the hottest man in the universe. Just be sure to have a barf bag next to you.